Our first retrospective review, brough to you in glorious MSN transcript!
Britta says: (22:12:42)
hi
Jim says: (22:12:48)
Hello!
Jim says: (22:12:58)
Hiding off line, I see
Britta says: (22:13:03)
yes ^__^
Britta says: (22:13:07)
bwahahaa
Jim says: (22:13:21)
Anyhoo, let me begin by introducing the concept of the Retrospective Reviews
Britta says: (22:13:25)
k
Jim says: (22:14:15)
Well, the feelings a film creates, and the general impression, are probably best judge by what people remember months after
Jim says: (22:14:27)
If you still think a film is awesome after 6 months, chances are it was
Jim says: (22:14:54)
So we're here to review films we watched a while back without revisiting them
Jim says: (22:15:12)
All ignorance is completely genuine, folks
Jim says: (22:15:54)
Well, we're here to review James Cameron's multi-million dollar blockbuster Avatar
Britta says: (22:16:09)
which was damn good
Jim says: (22:16:10)
And as I remember, Britta saw it about a month before I did
Jim says: (22:16:13)
Indeed
Britta says: (22:16:22)
with my family ^_^
Jim says: (22:16:32)
So I think you should give me your low down before my horrible, bitter, cynical viewpoint butts in
Jim says: (22:16:45)
La de da :P
Britta says: (22:17:02)
and then I insisted Jim see it with me, gave me an excuse to see it again :P
Britta says: (22:17:25)
ok, well I thought it was AMAZING and it is the only film I can remember coming out of feeling so strongly about it
Britta says: (22:17:38)
everyone was having to adjust back to reality
Jim says: (22:17:39)
Oh, so that was why?
Jim says: (22:17:47)
Selfish beeyatch
Britta says: (22:17:52)
and feeling a little dissapointed to have to do so
Jim says: (22:17:57)
Aww
Britta says: (22:18:13)
nooooo because it was awesome and I thought you'd want to enjoy the awesomeness too
Jim says: (22:18:17)
Did you want to be a Nar'vee?
Britta says: (22:18:21)
YES
Jim says: (22:18:25)
LOL
Jim says: (22:18:35)
To be honest, who wouldn't?
Britta says: (22:18:37)
tiny humans are rubbish in comparison
Jim says: (22:18:48)
That reminds me of one of the cutest moments
Britta says: (22:18:56)
at the end?
Jim says: (22:19:12)
When Jake's alien squeeze came and rescued his little human body from the caravan in the woods
Britta says: (22:19:18)
yeah :)
Jim says: (22:19:27)
Little human man! He so small!
Britta says: (22:19:36)
and she managed not to recoil in disgust
Jim says: (22:19:38)
I keep him as pet.
Britta says: (22:19:40)
haha
Britta says: (22:19:50)
not that humans are disgusting
Jim says: (22:19:52)
He was cute! About the only time he was, mind you.
Britta says: (22:20:12)
but if you've fallen in love with a big blue thing it's weird to see the little pink thing that he really is
Jim says: (22:20:17)
Okay, something really freaky about the cuteness factor...
Jim says: (22:20:23)
Heh. little pink thing eh? ;)
Britta says: (22:20:27)
hehe yeah :P
Jim says: (22:20:38)
I might prefer a big blue thing, its true
Jim says: (22:20:40)
Anyway
Jim says: (22:20:48)
As you know, I like Sigourny Weaver
Britta says: (22:20:52)
yus
Jim says: (22:20:53)
She am pretty
Britta says: (22:21:05)
she am strong like cheetah
Jim says: (22:21:08)
And all natural, as we found out watching alien
Jim says: (22:21:18)
:D Cheetah with a gun
Britta says: (22:21:23)
tiny pants ^_^
Britta says: (22:21:25)
hehe
Jim says: (22:21:31)
Huge..er..foliage
Jim says: (22:22:02)
Anyway, if someone had asked me what I would have said if I saw a 12 foot tall muscular blue Sigourney weaver
Jim says: (22:22:06)
I would have said...
Jim says: (22:22:10)
Well, probably nothing
Jim says: (22:22:16)
I would have just collapsed on the floor
Britta says: (22:22:20)
just fainted from lack of head blood?
Jim says: (22:22:27)
Yes, exactly
Britta says: (22:22:31)
hmm
Britta says: (22:22:40)
so what did you think when you saw her?
Jim says: (22:22:49)
I was FREAK-ED OUT.
Jim says: (22:22:58)
Her Narvee really hits the uncanny valley for me
Jim says: (22:23:15)
Especially the way her legs move, for some reason
Jim says: (22:23:17)
Is weird
Britta says: (22:23:35)
I never noticed any strange leggage
Jim says: (22:23:49)
But on the other hand, I actually found Jake's Nar'vee quite sexy.
Jim says: (22:23:58)
When in reality he is a potato-faced squadie
Jim says: (22:24:13)
The Strange Leggage of Sigourney Weaver
Britta says: (22:24:13)
yeah I agree he was attractive
Jim says: (22:24:17)
In Cinema's Now!
Jim says: (22:24:39)
Maybe all ugly people are sexy as Nar'vee
Jim says: (22:24:45)
And all sexy people are weird
Britta says: (22:24:54)
maybe his face just suited it better
Britta says: (22:24:57)
meh
Jim says: (22:25:11)
His face definitely suited being something different
Britta says: (22:25:18)
You're being mean
Jim says: (22:25:22)
Poor potato faced Jake
Britta says: (22:25:24)
he's not that unattractive
Britta says: (22:25:32)
you just don't like that he's a soldier
Jim says: (22:25:38)
Like the incompetent carvings of a drunken toddler
Jim says: (22:25:48)
Yes, I really am being mean
Jim says: (22:26:03)
He is fair looking, and I do dislike the military mens
Jim says: (22:26:25)
Especially that guy in the film, actually
Jim says: (22:26:34)
The Colonel, or whatever
Britta says: (22:26:34)
the main bad guy?
Jim says: (22:26:36)
Yeah
Britta says: (22:26:47)
yeah he's far too muscly and gross
Jim says: (22:26:52)
I mean, I know it is supposed to be a simplistic, easy-to-engage with story
Jim says: (22:27:00)
And so it has douchebag bad guys
Jim says: (22:27:09)
But he was a MASSIVE prick
Jim says: (22:27:23)
For 2 english pence, I would have put out his remaining eye
Jim says: (22:27:30)
With my thumb
Britta says: (22:27:31)
not for freeeeee?
Jim says: (22:27:41)
Well, even evil has standards my love
Jim says: (22:27:48)
And I am, as we all know, very evil
Britta says: (22:28:10)
I suppose the 2p would pay for being squeamish about putting your thumb in his eye socket
Jim says: (22:28:24)
Yeah...although eyes are quite tough
Jim says: (22:28:33)
Enough of this grossness
Jim says: (22:28:41)
What else do you remember from the film?
Britta says: (22:29:05)
It was very beautiful, all the glowing fluorescent jungle scenes especially
Britta says: (22:29:52)
and when he's gone small and scrawny from lack of real-life exercise it was a good contrast between the reality and the fantasy
Jim says: (22:30:20)
Yes, I have to agree the jungle was amazing
Jim says: (22:30:46)
The level of care was up to Dark Crystal standards
Britta says: (22:30:20)
and I liked the fact they had to learn their language
Britta says: (22:30:40)
and not just have the aliens learn English, or have a universal translator
Jim says: (22:30:52)
Yeah, good point
Jim says: (22:31:05)
Slightly better sci-fi elements than most gave it credit for
Jim says: (22:31:39)
What about the 3D? I seem to remember you were all for it, like a big populist sheep would be.
Britta says: (22:33:09)
The 3D was good. I thought it worked well and I remember saying it was the first film where the 3D actually blended into the storytelling and didn't seem like a gimmick like in Coraline or Monsters vs Aliens
Britta says: (22:33:53)
I mean it didn't blend perfectly, but it seemed like film-making was on the path to incorporating it in a better way
Britta says: (22:34:34)
like I'm sure when colour and sound first came out it didn't feel natural, but now it's a part of every film
Jim says: (22:34:37)
That is a good way of looking at it
Jim says: (22:34:49)
Although I genuinely can't see 3D becoming like sound and colour
Britta says: (22:35:14)
maybe not quite but certainly not a jolting intrusion
Jim says: (22:35:23)
Because sound and colour are part of our world, whereas 3D on a 2D canvas will always be unnatural
Jim says: (22:35:28)
Hmm...
Britta says: (22:35:42)
what did you think of the 3D? as I recall it gave you a headache?
Jim says: (22:36:25)
Not a headache as such...as you know, I had a lot of trouble with the 3D...I find the glasses uncomfortable anyway, but at the time my eyesight had got very poor, I needed a new prescription for my own glasses and so I had to sit right at the front. It made my eyes ache.
Jim says: (22:36:54)
I'm trying not to be 'cooler than thou' but I really only noticed the 3D when it was irking me
Britta says: (22:36:54)
Sitting at the front makes your eyes ache tis true :(
Jim says: (22:37:23)
:P Having strobing images 10 feet wide makes your eyes ache
Jim says: (22:37:34)
I would much rather have seen it in 2D
Jim says: (22:37:44)
And look forward to doing so when we get it on DVD
Britta says: (22:38:03)
me too ^____^
Jim says: (22:38:24)
Obviously, there's not much to say about the plot that hasn't already been said
Jim says: (22:38:36)
And even then people go on bout it CONSTANTLY
Britta says: (22:38:44)
yup. pretty predictable. let's move on
Jim says: (22:38:56)
I did want to make a point about it as an allegory, though
Jim says: (22:39:32)
Because people often equate it to the plight of indigenous cultures vs. the imperialists
Jim says: (22:39:46)
But it doesn't really hold up like that for one simple reason
Jim says: (22:39:58)
That being that humanity do not trade with the Nar'vee
Jim says: (22:40:09)
And conversly, that the Nar'vee don't want our stuff
Britta says: (22:40:13)
well they want to
Britta says: (22:40:24)
they try to find stuff the narvee will want
Britta says: (22:40:28)
but that doesn't work
Jim says: (22:40:33)
This is so
Jim says: (22:40:41)
But it just doesn't hold up historically
Jim says: (22:41:21)
From the Native Americans to the Aboriginals and the South American peoples, the natives have ALWAYS wanted what the invaders offered
Britta says: (22:41:27)
ooooooo I think in a sequel the narvee should use the technology to walk around as little tube-grown humans!
Britta says: (22:41:44)
yeah that's true
Jim says: (22:41:48)
In fact it was often the trade that softened the way to allow them to be subjugated
Britta says: (22:41:53)
and in this one they're perfecty happy
Jim says: (22:41:53)
Heh :D Not a bad idea
Jim says: (22:42:18)
Surely some of the younger Nar'vee would like guns to hunt with
Britta says: (22:42:31)
hmmm they'd be wrong to u_u
Britta says: (22:42:45)
they need to learn the ways!
Jim says: (22:43:22)
Exactly, but wouldn't that make a better film? The old ones persuading them to keep to the old ways, the young ones more willing to accept humanity's diplomacy?
Britta says: (22:43:30)
maybe
Jim says: (22:43:40)
And one more point on this...the Nar'vee aren't hippies
Britta says: (22:43:57)
but the older ones probably wouldn't allow humans to be talking to their children
Jim says: (22:44:16)
That's why the children would totally talk to them
Jim says: (22:44:18)
Rebellion!
Britta says: (22:44:24)
suppose so
Britta says: (22:44:41)
they aren't hippies indeed u_u
Jim says: (22:44:54)
They are what hippies TRY to be
Jim says: (22:45:00)
And fail to be
Jim says: (22:45:16)
Hippies can't telepathically interface with horses
Jim says: (22:45:26)
If they could, people might like them better
Britta says: (22:45:28)
omg if I could be as hippyish as them
Britta says: (22:45:53)
would be awesome
Britta says: (22:45:56)
yeah
Britta says: (22:46:03)
also take less drugs
Jim says: (22:46:12)
Yus
Britta says: (22:46:26)
(as in, they should. I already don't take any drugs)
Jim says: (22:46:44)
(or interface with horses)
Jim says: (22:46:50)
(despite what some people say)
Britta says: (22:47:17)
just a little clarification for the wonderful internet peoples who do not know me personally
Jim says: (22:47:27)
:D
Britta says: (22:47:30)
but what about what the horses say?
Britta says: (22:47:42)
:P
Jim says: (22:47:45)
You don't interface with them.
Jim says: (22:47:46)
Much.
Jim says: (22:47:53)
So, Avatar...
Jim says: (22:48:04)
Any last points?
Britta says: (22:48:17)
well we haven't actually heard your opinion of it yet
Britta says: (22:48:27)
your scathing review
Jim says: (22:48:31)
Ok :D
Jim says: (22:48:43)
Well after that build up, my review isn't scathing at all
Jim says: (22:48:57)
The one word I consistently used to describe it to others was 'charming'
Jim says: (22:49:37)
I think it is pure fantasy and pure escapism, that people who get to worked up about it in either direction have entirely missed the point of what it is, and that it is very beautiful and well made
Jim says: (22:49:56)
And being the sensitive boy I am, I did cry several times
Jim says: (22:50:05)
Like a school girl would
Britta says: (22:50:11)
:)*
Britta says: (22:50:38)
so what are your criticisms?
Jim says: (22:50:55)
Well, the plot is baggy
Jim says: (22:51:09)
Its too long (my eternal criticism)
Jim says: (22:51:13)
Predictable
Jim says: (22:51:57)
But really these things are beside the point
Jim says: (22:52:06)
Like I said before, its not something to get serious about
Jim says: (22:52:16)
Its just fun; big, good looking, expensive fun
Britta says: (22:53:03)
ooo I've just remembered one thing I really liked :D near the end when Main Girl totally beat Soldier Mans butt, and wasn't wishy-washy and hesitaty about it.
Jim says: (22:53:56)
Heh
Jim says: (22:53:57)
Yeah
Jim says: (22:54:02)
She kicked his punk ass
Britta says: (22:54:27)
she was practical and got business sorted out before she could go save lil pink man
Britta says: (22:54:44)
which I admire u_u much better than the silly girl in Halloween
Jim says: (22:55:16)
Poor little pink man
Jim says: (22:55:36)
I suppose we could go into the portrayal of disabled people in film at this point...
Britta says: (22:55:36)
it's ok, he gets to be one in the end :)
Jim says: (22:55:51)
But I am rather torn on the issue
Britta says: (22:55:55)
??
Jim says: (22:57:21)
Well, some people complained that Jake was seen as useless when he lost his legs...others that he was actually a shining example of how disabled soldiers could rise again
Jim says: (22:57:31)
Either one is flawed really
Jim says: (22:57:52)
Although it is interesting how his Narvee body kind of becomes like a drug
Jim says: (22:57:59)
And his human existence a dream
Britta says: (22:58:01)
well I'm inclined to see it the positive way
Britta says: (22:58:09)
they find him something he can do, and he does it
Jim says: (22:59:26)
Yes, that is the bottom line
Jim says: (23:00:06)
As we mentioned at the beginning, who the hell WOULDN'T be a Nar'vee? If I had perfectly functioning limbs, I'd be all over that shit.
Jim says: (23:00:21)
Sorry human body, you're only second best now
Britta says: (23:00:35)
aww we could still keep it around
Jim says: (23:00:43)
Yeah
Jim says: (23:00:48)
As a spare
Jim says: (23:00:55)
While I'm busy being blue and sexy
Britta says: (23:00:57)
I feel sorry for smaller Jim body
Britta says: (23:00:59)
hehe
Jim says: (23:01:11)
Making blue love with my blue Britta
Britta says: (23:01:18)
^___^
Jim says: (23:01:31)
And on that note...
Britta says: (23:01:37)
hmm?
Jim says: (23:01:50)
I think we ought to wrap it up
Britta says: (23:01:53)
yus
Jim says: (23:02:03)
I mean, how will be reach a higher pinnacle than blue sex?
Jim says: (23:02:12)
No way, no how
Britta says: (23:02:17)
in conclusion, darn good film, everyone must see it
Jim says: (23:02:46)
Yes, if only to see what all the fuss is about
Britta says: (23:03:05)
and then go back to your dreary little lives
Britta says: (23:03:15)
walking through the rain
Britta says: (23:03:37)
talking on your rubbish technology mobile, buying a ready-made frozen dinner
Jim says: (23:03:41)
Eating a sandwich. A dreary, non-blue sandwich.
Britta says: (23:04:04)
entangled in all the demands of everyday life
Britta says: (23:04:12)
why not live in a tree?
Britta says: (23:04:16)
in the sunshine
Britta says: (23:04:25)
it's warm enough that you don't need clothes
Britta says: (23:04:32)
everyone is fit and strong
Jim says: (23:04:35)
And sexy!
Britta says: (23:04:36)
aaaaah ^__^
Britta says: (23:04:43)
Jim I think you're a bit obsessed
Jim says: (23:04:52)
Just telling it like it is
Britta says: (23:04:55)
it is true that they are sexy
Jim says: (23:05:05)
So, yes
Jim says: (23:05:09)
Watch Avatar
Jim says: (23:05:16)
4/5
Britta says: (23:05:22)
5/5!